I don’t deserve forgiveness.
That’s the view of Lake Ouachita from my campsite. I took an impromptu trip back home for Mother’s Day camping. I love it out here. The kids are gathering wood while I get the fire going. I did the same with my dad out here many times when I was a child. Truth is, they’re […]
My kids are my entire life. Without them, Mother’s Day would be the holiday to drown myself in booze, have a breakdown, and end up in jail for public intox. You try to have me committed on Mother’s Day weekend?!! I swear on every fucking star in our galaxy that if I’m separated from my […]
You know this is for you. Don’t worry, I won’t tell them your name. I’ll just call you Ghost. It’s fitting because you vanished 17 months ago. I don’t see you, but I’m haunted by you. I didn’t mean to love you, but you made it so damn easy. I wonder if hurting me was […]
Have you ever heard a song that took the breath out of your chest? This one has that effect on me: Music is pretty fucking powerful. Songs are stories and often the story is the listener’s own truth. There aren’t many elements in the universe that can provoke an emotional response from me quite like […]
This is a revision of a post that I wrote a few hours ago, but I just made it private. It tells of my brokenness and it is a full blown suicide note. No one reads this anyway, so I could have just left it up. Clearly, I did not follow through. This doesn’t mean […]
The wreckage of her soul is poetic. Her verses cascade from her eyes in iambic pentameter. Her survival is a fiery resilience, that engulfs her parchment; each page set aflame and extinguished in her storm. There is beauty in how she rises from her ruins, in the midst of her own destruction.
On days like this, I am the house and the ghost, responsible for my own haunting. My brain is a revolver with, “Am I good enough?” in every chamber. So I turn into a factory that only makes the word “yes” and I say it until I can easily Mistake it for the truth, but […]
Fuck the meds. That’s really all I have to say. I busted my ass to lose weight after my divorce. I lost over 35 pounds. I weighed in heavier than I’ve ever been in my life today. I gained it back and then some. My friends told me I would gain on my medicine. Fuck […]
I rise out of the chasm. My feet are firm, securely lodged on solid terrain. I am recuperating, but I remain unsteady. The wind caresses my hair, teasing and testing my verve. With a solitary squall, I collapse. The force is cataclysmic. All radiance wavers into obscurity again. I plummet at Gravity’s command. It’s heavy […]